In light of my experience at tonight's David Gray show at Uptown Theater, I realize that there is a huge untapped market that I'm about to fill. We know you love the experience, but isn't it a hassle to come out to the theater? Let me bring it to you.
For the same price as a front row seat, I'll make your experience real!
-I will play music loudly so you have to yell at each other over it. I'll bring two friends to sit on each side of you and look annoyed. In the middle of the evening, I'll play the one song you actually know from the artist so you can scream, pay attention for a few minutes, sing the chorus and then go back to yelling! I'll be sure to play music I really enjoy so you can keep me distracted, and I'll pay lots of quiet songs for you to yell inappropriately during. Don't miss your chance to clap along to quiet, thoughtful songs!
-I will stand on the other side of your back yard with a guitar. That way, you can replicate all of those dark blurry photos that you can't make out and you'll never look at again. You can claim the aberration in the photo is anyone you want! You can even turn on your point and shoot flash to try to illuminate me from hundreds of feet away. Just keep shooting, it might work someday! Hold that camera high over your head!
-I will bring a universal phone charger so you never have to stop texting your friends. Be sure to yell over the music to tell each other about your texts!
-I will sell you warm, watered-down Bud Light for as much as you want to pay, then crowd you so you can spill it on me.
-Best of all, I'll give you a high five after two hours and agree with you when you say it was the "best concert ever!"
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3 comments:
Hmmmm. So was David Gray good in concert or not? I can't appreciate reviews or reviewers who can't simply review the show. How was the sound? What was the performance like? What was the highlight? Was the performer well received? Did any thing extraordinary happen? Perhaps a comparison to another performer who did better or worse. And most importantly, would you recommend going to a show by this performer.
You like so many other reviewers who always want to place your self in the review. You're not why people paid money and went to the concert. You're not why I clicked the link to read your review. The show has nothing to do with you. Your entire review was a shit metaphor that not so subtly bagged on the crowd and the performance and gave no real information about the actual event. You're not interesting and you gave no real information. Good luck with your reviews or blog or whatever. You're just a small part of the egocentric crap that passes for journalism these days.
Tye
Hey Tye,
Here's the deal: that was never intended as a review, nor was it really about me. It was a sarcastic parody of the modern concert experience, where people seem to be more involved with taking useless photos, chatting with their friends and texting than they are with this show. As someone that really loves music and immerses himself in the live music experience, this frustrates me and distracts from my enjoyment of the show. This sarcastic post was simply a light-hearted editorial on that topic. Trust me, it could have been worse.
As for the show, it was exceptional, thanks for asking. The setlist was a solid list of palatable choices from his new album mixed with older favorites. The typical David Gray formula of pretty straight-forward renditions of most of the set with two or three songs embellished. The jams on those were great, with dramatic waxing and waning for a real emotional punch.
Sound was impeccable, as it usually is on the floor at the Uptown. This was my third time seeing David Gray and this was the best set and sound. The others were Boston and Minneapolis. It was also a treat that he came to KC since he usually has only a small handful of US tour dates.
In any case, I'm sorry if you were looking for a review. It is understandable that you were left wanting as a review was never my intention.
I must say that I 'got' what Matthew was trying to say, having suffered through an almost identical experience at Gray's Houston show. Saw him again last night in Baltimore and it was totally different - no beer spilling, little or no texting (though still some) and not as many attempts to photograph from 500 feet. But the problem on the flipside is that the audience sat down the entire night - through the entire concert, and not just the quiet, introspective (as Gray said, somber) moments - the entire night. I guess if I had to trade I'd still take that, but it would be real nice to find a middle ground...
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